Music

Metallica: A Proper Introduction

Short of playing in the Super Bowl, Metallica is just about everywhere. Wal-Mart, Old Navy, Target, your local radio station. Makes it a little hard to weed out the posers, but we welcome everyone here, regardless of whether or not you own a Metallica shirt without ever actually listening to Metallica (besides Enter Sandman or One, because that doesn’t count).

Metallica. Pre-Napster Lawsuits. Pre-Haircuts. 1983.

So, whatever motivated you to read this, read on my friend! Because you’ll either unposerize yourself, or re-energize your love for one of America’s best thrash metal bands, and trust me, we (Americans) don’t have many.

  1. The Beginning of an Era

Kill ‘Em All (Remastered) (180 Gram Vinyl)

Ah yes, the album that started it all. It takes many bands a while to find their sound and rarely are first albums truly any good—but this is an absolute banger containing some of their most infamous songs. The Four Horsemen, Jump in the Fire, Seek & Destroy. All those scrumdiddlyumptious riffs to make your heart sing.

2. The Essentials

Ride The Lightning (Remastered) (180 Gram Vinyl)

We’re only listing essential albums here, and yes, this very much includes Ride the Lightning. An ambitiously solid sophomore album that continued on with their trademark aggressive riffs while still finding a way to grow in sound and technicality from their previous release. With popular songs such as “For Whom the Bell Tolls,” “Fade to Black,” and “Ride the Lightning,” you kind of have to own a copy of this.  don’t care who you are.

3. Metallica Makes It To The Big Screen

Metallica – Through the Never

Through the Never got plenty of hate after its 2014 release on the big screen. I don’t blame fans—they paid $8 – 10 for a movie ticket to watch what many thought was an overly produced and crappy storyline. BUT, it has a solid 7.2/10 on IMDB and 4.5 stars out of 2,287 ratings on Amazon so clearly not everyone agrees. “The music-driven feature film combines a bold narrative and spectacular live footage of one of the most popular and influential Rock bands in history to produce a bracing, raw and visceral cinematic experience.” For $15, it’s a note-worthy addition to any fan’s collection.

4. …And Justice For All

…And Justice For All (Remastered)(2LP)

…And Justice For All contains some of my favorite songs. “Blackened,” “One,” “The Shortest Straw,” “Harvester of Sorrow,”…well geez, just the entire album. So, buy it! Listen to it! Memorize it! Head bang to it! All for an official initiation into the Metallica fan club. We’re all pretty lame. 

5. Metal Up Your A**

Metallica Men’s Metal Up T-Shirt

I needed to include this quintessential Metallica shirt as a nod to their roots. If you’re lucky enough to have an original from 1987, well, I’m jealous. 

6. One Trivia Book to Rule (Kill) ‘Em All

The Badass Metallica Trivia Book: Uncover The Epic History Behind The American Heavy Metal Band!

If you’re really trying to test your knowledge on Metallica’s history just for the heck of it, it’s time to buy the Metallica trivia book. A band so iconic they managed to get their own darn trivia book. 

7. Putting The Pieces Together

Metallica Creeping Death (500 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle)

I probably could’ve listed every album, but I’ll leave it up to you to scavenger through the rest of their golden (and some not so golden) nuggets. Instead, I’ll take it back to the single for Ride the Lightning—”Creeping Death.” Now you can piece together this iconic artwork with a 500 piece jigsaw puzzle. Play some Metallica while you’re at it.

8. Picks of Destiny

Kirk Hammett Monster Pick Tin

Whether or not you play the guitar, these Kirk Hammett monster picks are a pretty neat collectible. Each one includes unique artwork and is modeled after picks he uses on tour. Kirk Hammett not your guy? Grab some James Hetfield ones instead.

Well, I think that’s enough for you to be on your merry way. Rock those Metallica shirts, spin those records because despite their war on Napster, we all love us some Metallica. Except maybe St. Anger, but let’s not get into that right now.

Thoughts, comments, questions, concerns, an overbearing need to voice your opinion? Leave your comments below.

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